It was but a dream….

The rapture has come and gone.

Evolution of modern Hominids

Evolution of Homo Sapiens

Evolution of Homo Neanderthalensis

So what are we looking at? Well, the first drawing shows the evolution of Homo Sapiens, personified by the Arab woman. The second drawing shows the evolution of Homo Neanderthalensis, personified by what could either be a religious policeman, or a Wahhabi, or a salafi. There’s  really not much difference.

We start of with Australopithecus, and after a couple of million years, or the fourth figure, we have come to Homo Erectus, capable of making tools, some more million years later, at the fifth figure, we have reached our current height of evolution; Homo Sapiens.
You can see the woman has  discovered agriculture, she’s making cloth and embellishing her dress, she has invented pottery and many other things. At the corresponding fifth little Neanderthal figure, you can see she has taught him to walk upright, to wear clothes and to brush his teeth using a stick of mishwak.
Now what happened after the fifth figures? Well, about 1400 years ago the Homo Neanderthalenses took control, they started suppressing women, locking them up, even when outside, inventing a black cloth prison, denying them freedom and personality, and as you can see evolution ground to a halt. They kept brushing their teeth with mishwak. While Homo Sapiens women are slowly suffocated into ghosts, the Homo Neanderthalensis remain the same. For many more millennia.
For ever. Without women they are not capable of further development.

Raptor Countdown (2011 version) 4 days to go!

Four days until we get Raptored!

But does one really want to?????

So Jesus went extinct for our sins…
So our sins are ”paid for”. So why all the punishment?
Are our sins paid for or not? Or did Jesus go extinct for nothing?
What’s up?
On May 21 we might find out…

Of course ”evolutionists” are out. Whatever. Even if their sins were paid for…

Rapture Countdown (2011 version). 5 Days to go!

If you were wondering when the actual end of the world is, this is set for October 17 2011. Which leaves enough time for this year’s, final, Wacken Heavy Metal Festival.
And I read on one of the many rapture sites that all plants and animals will burn and be destroyed and turned into ash. That is só unfair!
I am wondering if I really want to be saved, because I an starting to think that God is a really nasty  dude.

So here’s my diary so far:

Monday 16

Peducure for horses, find job
Make more lists
Work on painting

Tuesday 17

Clean house dig up my bible and start reading. Go to the market to buy fruit and vegetables

Wednesday 18

Keep reading the bible and start making a pattern for a fifties style dress. (which I will need to ascend to heaven in)
Take painting to the framers
Visit the Tarq

Thursday 19

Make appointment at hairdressers for Friday, start making 50s style dress.
Train the Tarq and try to make him behave well.
Learn how to knit.

friday 20

Preparations: Laundry, housecleaning, loo has to be spotless.
go to the Tarq and wash the Tarq
Go to hairdresser for that rapture look hairdo.
Hide all flying-brooms in cupboard, as well as all wicca handbooks.

Saturday 21

Check list, dress up in 50s dress, hair perfect, sit and wait.

The End of the World! (2011 version)

For those who have missed it, the end of the world is nigh.
Again.
This year God has planned the rapture for May 21.
The rapture is something that will happen before hand. Jesus will come back, those who will be saved will be lifted up from the Earth, and those who won’t be saved will be left to be tortured until we (yes, I think I will be one of them) beg for death.
Because God loves us.

I looked into my diary and noticed I have made an appointment to go riding with my friends and our horses on the 22nd. How silly of me! Of course we will be there but surely our horses will be lifted off the Earth, cute, innocent and adorable creatures that they are.
So I propose a barbecue. I suppose what with all the fire and brimstone we can expect a barbecue should be a sure success. And yes, there will be pork meat, but if you are Muslim and you can go to my barbecue you already know you are not among the chosen ones so can have as much pork as you like.

Here’s a good site to check out all the details of the upcoming slaughter. I wasn’t quite sure weather they were being funny or if they really meant it. I often get it wrong. However, it seems they really mean it and it will provide you with all the important details.

I think I will be starting a countdown until next week.

You are all welcome on the 22nd!

As this picture proves you will have to be white, Christian, and I strongly suggest you visit the hairdresser on Friday, to qualify for ascending to heaven. The angels are also white and have really neat hairdos. It seems very important to be married, and to have two or more children.

Teach the controversy

Long ago, Frith made the world

The alternative explanation

I have been thinking, and worrying, about the serious and deadly tsunamis which are punishing humanity lately. It is high time we do something about these tsunamis and make them stop. Now many religious leaders have the right idea and blame our irreligious ways, gay marriage, people having sex, and the rise of atheism. But I see a controversy here: they don’t have it quite right.

You see, while there maybe people having sex, and gay people, and scientists, and atheists all over the place, so are religious weirdos, religious fundamentalists, suicide killers, etc. There’s Al qaida, the tea-baggers, the creationists, and they are all doing well! Amassing huge fortunes, indoctrinating scores of children, these people are working very hard and are quite successful!
Yet it clearly is not enough.
Because they have it wrong! All thse people pray to the monotheistic desert god first invented by the Jews, later appropriated by the Christians, and Muslims, who then, although they all worship the same god, still think they have to kill each other.

Ok, so all this religious  insanity we see around these days doesn’t seem to have enough effect to stop or even decrease the severity of the tsunamis. The truth is, (as proven by what’s happening) that they are all praying to the wrong god.
The correct god to pray to if you are worried about tsunamis is: Poseidon

I mean, look at this noble face, the beard, the intelligent forehead. You can see how the later religions derived their idea of how god looks after Poseidon’s image. But they left his worship, and now we are being punished!

And so Poseidon is woefully neglected nowadays. Not only that, as far as I know he never even had temples build in Japan or the far east. No wonder these places are the first to get hit!

We need to re-asses our religious believes and pray to those gods that actually have an official task. Wodan or Zeus when it comes to thunder and lightning, Poseidon to stop tsunamis, etc.

Take heed of the controversy! Churches and temples and mosques should be teaching the controversy!

Morality and Meteorology

I don’t get the connection between Morality and Meteorology Religious leaders are so fond of.
Earthquakes are caused by women showing cleavage, according to an iranian religious Muslim scholar.
According to an American Christian religous nutter leader he flooding of New Orleans was caused by gay people being gay, and I suppose by inference the fact that so many people tolerate the existence of gays, without slaughtering them as God wants us to…
The flooding of England’s North Yorkshire was also caused by the existence of gays according to a bishop of the English Anglican church…
The great tsunami of 2004 was of course appropriated by all religious leaders of all religions as punishment for whatever their personal preference in sin.

Now, I think that God is making a mistake here, for one thing it seems a bit bizarre that God has problems with his own creation, eg gays and cleavages, for the other his aim seems to be lamentably off for a supernatural all powerfull being…
Or, if his meteorological aim is true, God seems to be, not only very unfair, but also wholly inadequate. Human nature being what it is (as created by God), I think I speak the truth if I say that the hussies who display their cleavages on the beaches of France and Spain, or the nightclubs in Amsterdam, not only would not stop their evil immoral displays because of Earthquakes in Iran, but I am sure they don’t even know about it!
Same goes for those people who indulge in loving relationships to those people God has given them a sexual preference for.

In truth, all logical conclusions seem to lead to only one fact: meteorology has nothing to do with morality has nothing to do with some allmighty supernatural being who cannot aim.
Which leads to the conclusion that religious leaders are mentally deficient.
Which leads to the obvious conclusion that sane, normal, intelligent people should become very weary as soon as somebody proclaims themselves a religious authority.
If that wasn’t obvious before I even started this post…

Kiss my ass

I am always right.
It is one of these mysteries of the universe, but it’s true. Really, I am always right.
So when I say something, people should listen up, and just believe me and do what I say.
what’s so difficult to understand about that?
All you need is to believe…
And to   kiss  my  ass

😈

This is how it works:

The religious metaphor

One particular subject one comes across when discussing religions and the horrible evil stuff written in all religious handbooks is the ”religious metaphor”.

I was used to this from European christians, who excuse the truly totally evil bits in the bible with the excuses of: ”It has to be seen in the context of the time” and ”It’s a metaphor”.
And I hear the same from Muslims, especially Western Muslims and nice Muslims, as the quran is actually very clear about that it is to be taken literal as the last word of god, and most people in the Middle East are holding on to the view that the quran has to be followed by the letter. They also spend a lot of money enforcing this idea in other parts of the world.

So, context of the time. Doesn’t fly, if a handbook is to remain valid, and has divine inspiration in it’s inception then there can be no historical context.

Metaphor, isn’t realistic either because that would make every part of the handbook to be interpreted as you like so why have a handbook in the first place?

So what happens?
Evolution happens.
Mental and moral evolution.
The current Abrahamic religions are based on the acts desires and morals of what we would now consider very primitive barbaric people with apparently  very primitive understandings of what is good and bad.
If you take the handbooks they wrote as an indication of their moral standing.
On the other hand, one can clearly discern  a lot of very human desires for power and wealth, as well as a deep disdain towards women in these handbooks. This power and wealth is for the advantage of the leading faction of the religion and the religion is used besides to giving them power, also to stabilize that status quo, and to make the ”flock” submissive. These religions are very strong on submission and making it a desirable trait.

So why do modern believers need the religious metaphor?
Contrary to what we are being told all the time, the Abrahamic religions are not really that moral from our point of view. Actually there are precious few morals in the religious handbooks of our time, and none of the basic morals they do propound is not also indigenous to the most primitive stone age culture.
In reality the Abrahamic religious handbooks have not added anything enlightened to the moral values of humanity.

Actually I am of the opinion that religions actually twist and corrupt our innate morality by inciting violence, hatred, discrimination, bad treatment of children, and suppression of women.
and allowing and supporting rape.

Rape as an example.
Rape is something we condemn nowadays as we know it is a very bad crime towards women, it hurts them, it causes great suffering and psychological damage and we modern humans think that every human being (women are human too) has a right over their own body.

We now think it is a bad crime to badly hurt a woman by raping her.
Probably all women have always thought so, but clearly not all men!
Rape was clearly not a concern for the men who compiled the handbooks of the Abrahamic religions. While they are all obsessed with sex, and who has sex with whom and in which manner etc. None of the handbooks considers rape a crime. The Quran doesn’t even mention it. What they do do is allowing men to rape women. (read it up, I am not going to give examples)

Do you really think there is an all powerful invisible sky daddy who cares for you, loves you, and then allows men to rape you?

I can imagine men liking this sky daddy, but I am amazed women think this invisible enabler has any caring, loving, protective feeling towards them.

In comes the ”metaphor”. The metaphor is the believers escape route. Without the metaphor a believer whose moral awareness has evolved far beyond that of the men who composed the religion cannot believe anymore. But most people are to scared of a universe without some invisible force ”guiding” them that they cannot face the stark light their own moral awareness lights up for them.

They hide in the metaphor. Not realizing that by using the metaphor to make their religious handbook compatible to their advanced moral awareness they have already left the restrictions and guidance of that very same handbook. By using the religious metaphor they in effect already stand on their own feet. They don’t need guidance. They have defined for themselves what they know is right and wrong, despite the contrary instructions of their religious guidebook.

If you can only deal with your chosen religion by using metaphors then you don’t need religion anymore because you have already evolved beyond it. You are already thinking for yourself despite religious indoctrination and that is a great achievement!